Fakebook: How are we portraying ourselves on Social Media?

We live in a social media driven world.  Recently, I read a blog that compared spending time on Facebook to viewing Pornography.  One of the ways this author compares Facebook to Porn is Envy.  We see something on a status and we want to have it. He writes, "The more you look at it the more you want it.
The more you look at it the more you realize you can’t have it. The more you realize you can’t have it the more hopeless you become."

This really got me thinking about how we portray ourselves.  It is hard not to envy someone who is posting about their concert experience, five star restaurant meal or trip to Disney World. The vast majority of the time we don't know what is really going on behind the camera lens.  Behind the perfect family photo, we don't see the couple on the brink of divorce.  Behind the picture of the four course dinner, we don't see the text message that says a dear family member has cancer. I know these exact scenarios may not be played out in every picture. The point is there are things going on behind the lens we don't know anything about.

Last weekend, I went with my daughter on a school trip to the Mavs game.  She earned the trip for being one of the top readers in her class.  We were able to share an incredible experience together.  Going to a NBA game, especially a Mavs game, is one of my all-time favorite things to do and sharing it with my daughter made it extra special.  I posted a picture on my Instagram, tweeted about the game and because my social networks are connected together, it all posted on Facebook.  From the outside looking in, it looked like an incredible night and it was with a few exceptions.

What you didn't see.....

1. You didn't see I was taking Antibiotics because I had been to the Doctor that morning with a Sore Throat.  Honestly, I didn't feel at all like being there. After driving home Saturday, I spent the rest of the day in bed miserable.
2. You didn't see I was sitting in the "nose bleeds" (aka upper deck) surrounded by some very excited 5th Grade students who loved the noise makers left on the seats by the Dallas Mavericks organization.  They loved them so much that they used them the entire game even during free throws when you are supposed to be quiet.  :)  It was their trip and they were having a blast.  
3. You didn't see the guy two rows back who obnoxiously yelled at the players, coaches and refs the entire game like they were sitting in the row in front of him.  He even had cute little nicknames for every player and yelled them constantly.  

Am I telling you these things to make you feel sorry for me? No...please don't...I got to have an incredible experience with my daughter that I would live again ...under the same conditions....if given the option. It was a memorable experience that we will both cherish for a long time. 

I'm putting this out there as an example that what we see is not always reality.  We take the perfect picture, put the perfect filter on it and write the perfect caption and hashtag.  

This post is not about trying to get you to quit posting your vacation pictures or telling the world about the prize you won.  It is a warning against envy and to let you know that not everything you see in a picture is reality. I like to keep my status updates and tweets positive. Well, occasionally there is a sports opinion that gets negative. :) I'm working on that.  My posts about life will stay positive.  I'm not going to rip the clerk that gave me a dirty look. I'm not going to announce on social media that I've had a "disagreement" with my wife or had to punish my kids. That does no one any good.  Just know, Rusty, Sasha, Mady and Kenzie are normal. We are not perfect, but are striving to be more like Jesus every day.  Some days we hit the mark better than others. Some days when we are not hitting the mark that great....we still manage to take the perfect picture.  :)

Podcasts - a great tool for Personal Growth

There are several podcasts that I listen to on a regular basis.  One of my growth goals is to listen to at least 104 lessons/sermons in the year 2014.  With a 30 minute commute to and from work, there is a lot of time in the car. Most mornings, I listen to a podcast on the way into town.

I listen to two different kinds of podcasts.  First, I listen to sermons. I get our Pastor's messages every week and it is a great resource as well.  Since I hear it live, I don't download it.  I do have it in my podcast app in case I miss one Sunday. His podcast is available at www.northsidechurchonline.com.  Second, I listen to leadership teachings.

Sermons (This is for Spiritual Growth)

The Oaks Fellowship - Pastor Scott Wilson is a great friend and an anointed preacher.  I am always challenged by his messages. Scott is an incredible story teller and he makes the word come alive.

Northplace - Pastor Bryan Jarrett is one of the best communicators of my generation.  He unpacks the word of God in a powerful and elegant way.

First Assembly of God, North Little Rock - I love to listen to Pastor Rod's messages.  His recent series on "How to Ruin your life" has challenged me in my walk with God.  He gives practical advice with solid theology.

People's Church, Oklahoma City - I love Pastor Herbert Cooper's creativity and passion.  He is an incredible communicator.

Leadership 

Dave Ramsey's Entreleadership Podcast - Great Podcast for Business Leaders/Entrepreneurs and Church Leaders

Perry Noble Leadership Podcast - He had a great podcast on hiring people.

Andy Stanley Leadership Podcast - I love Andy's conversational style.

Jesus Culture Leadership Podcast - Great podcast with leadership principles from the Jesus Culture leaders.  It includes book reviews and testimonies from athletes, etc.

How to get a post to go viral

Recently, my friend, Brian Dollar, had a post go viral.  Brian, a Kid's Pastor in North Little Rock, presented an approach for parents to talk to their kids about what they are watching on television.  The article was in response to Disney's recent airing of a Lesbian couple on the Television show "Good Luck Charlie." At the time of this writing, the post had been shared on Facebook almost 7,000 times. 

The reason the post went viral is that it struck a nerve. It hit on a hot topic of conversation and answered questions that many Christian parents, including myself, were asking.  It also brought out those that had a differing opinion than what Brian held.

The reality is that anytime you post an opinion or belief, whether a sports opinion or a religious belief, it has the potential to go viral. Your beliefs will not line up with other's beliefs and therefore could put you in the line of fire. Paul, the apostle, felt this struggle when he addressed the church in Galatia.  He wrote in Galatians 4:16, "Have I now become your enemy because I am telling you the truth?"

Before posting your beliefs, make sure you are....

1. Speaking the truth in love.

As followers of Christ, there are times for us to speak the truth in love. Ephesians 4:15 (NLT) boldly declares, "Instead, we will speak the truth in love, growing in every way more and more like Christ, who is the head of his body, the church."

I know those on the opposite side of an issue may not feel it is love to tell them our beliefs. Is it love for me to tell my daughters not to stick a fork into a light socket? Absolutely, I love them enough to tell them that what they are doing will hurt them.  Just because I believe scripture teaches something doesn't mean I hate you. It truly means I love and care for you enough to tell you that what you are doing could have eternal consequences. The important thing is that I'm conveying that love when I speak. 

2. Using wisdom

Ephesians 5:15 (NLT) "So be careful how you live. Don’t live like fools, but like those who are wise." There are things, such as some terminology, that needlessly offends those we are trying to help.

3. Never using social media to handle an issue you have with an individual

The Bible teaches how to handle conflict. Matthew 18:15 (NLT) states,  “If another believer[a] sins against you,[b] go privately and point out the offense. If the other person listens and confesses it, you have won that person back." 

People cannot read body language over social media.  They cannot sense the emotion behind what is being written.  Therefore, it is best to address an individual conflict in a face to face meeting.  

What is your plan for 2014?

This time of the year is a time for reflection and moving forward in a new year.  A lot of people make resolutions to change in the new year!  Mark Batterson in his new book, All In, writes, "You are only one decision away from a totally different life. Of course, it will probably be the toughest decision you’ll ever make. But if you have the courage to completely surrender yourself to the lordship of Jesus Christ, there is no telling what God will do. All bets are off because all bets are on God." What is that one decision you need to make? What is your plan to change?

In order to make the changes you need to make, you need a plan.  I'm not talking about a fad diet or a get rich quick scheme.  I'm talking about a intentional plan to change.

Here are some great resources to help you develop your plan to change.

This is a free e-book by Stephen Blandino to help you develop your personal growth plan.

http://stephenblandino.com/personal-growth-plan

Other Books:

Go! Starting a Personal Growth Revolution by Stephen Blandino

Ready, Set, Grow! by Scott Wilson (Great book for leaders to teach them how to help their teams grow!)

Developing the Leader within you by John C. Maxwell - Classic book on personal development!

Change before you have to by Rob Ketterling

Healthy Living:

http://www.fitpastors.com - A brand new ministry by my friend, Ricky Van Pay, that assists pastors and others on their journey to a healthy lifestyle.

Make 2014 the best year it can be! 

The Best Christmas Gift You Can Give

Do you struggle finding the right gift for that special someone? Gift buying can be a frustrating experience unless you really pay attention to what those around you want or need. 

I love Christmas.  I love the sights and the sounds and the beauty of the season.  Most of all, I love it because it is the time of the year we celebrate the birth of the Savior, Jesus.  So, what do you give someone who has everything....who owns the cattle on a thousand hills....who created the world? Simply put, God desires that we give ourselves totally to him.

Recently, I read this journal entry from Jonathan Edwards in Mark Batterson's new book, All In.  On January, 12, 1723, Edwards wrote this profound dedication to the Lord in his diary.  I hope it challenges you to give God complete control of your life this holiday season.  It is the best gift you could give our Savior.  He fully gave his life for us so that we could fully give ourselves to Him.

"I made a solemn dedication of myself to God, and wrote it down; giving up myself, and all that I had to God; to be for the future, in no respect, my own; to act as one that had no right to himself, in any respect. And solemnly vowed, to take God for my whole portion and felicity; looking on nothing else, as any part of my happiness, nor acting as if it were." - Jonathan Edwards

Batterson, Mark (2013-09-24). All In: You Are One Decision Away From a Totally Different Life (Kindle Locations 2292-2295). Zondervan. Kindle Edition. 

Making Tough Choices

This last month in youth, I have been speaking about the choices we make in life. Wouldn't it be great if we all had a personal Bible that told us exactly what to do and when to do it.  For example, in John 73:23, it would say that in the year 2009, you were to accept this job offer or go to this school  Unfortunately, we don't have that, but there are some questions that can help us in our decision making process.

1. What does the Bible say? The Bible is our guidebook for living.  It helps to discern what is sin and what is not.  It trains and corrects us.

2. What do we feel God speaking? The Holy Spirit gives us direction.  Proverbs 3:5-6 (NLT) “⁵Trust in the LORD with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. ⁶Seek his will in all you do, and he will direct your paths.”

3. What is the wise thing to do? Ephesians tells us to live as those who are wise, not as those who are unwise.  Andy Stanley has written an excellent book on this subject called "The Best Question Ever." In those times, we don't know what to do, ask what is the wise thing to do?

4. What do wise people say? There is wisdom in a multitude of counselors.  What do those who have made similar choices have to say? What do Godly people say? What do your Pastors or other church leaders say?
I hope this helps give you a filter for making tough decisions in life.

Books I'm Reading This Month

The older I get the more I enjoy reading.  Some of the books I read are required reading for a Men's Bible Study group I'm a part of.  Our Pastor will share books with our staff from time to time to help us grow as leaders.  There are some books that I read because the subject captivates me.  There are also books I read simply because I enjoyed previous books by the author.

Here are the books I've read this month.

1. All In - All In is a great book by Mark Batterson.  It declares we are only one decision away from a different life.  This book takes a journey through scripture as it challenges the reader to go All In and allow God to have control of your life so you can fulfill your eternal destiny.

2. Under Cover by John Bevere - Every believer needs to read this book.  In America, we have a democratic view of Christianity.  Christianity is the Kingdom of God with Christ as the head of the church.  This book will challenge your Americanized concept of the Kingdom of God.  It is powerful.  I am reading this book as a part of our Men's Bible Study group.

3. How to help your Pastor succeed by Dave Williams - This was an easy read that gives great advice to help you help your Pastor achieve the vision God has given him for the church.  It shares some real practical advice in the areas of Spiritual Warfare and Encouragement.